Dating. What a horrible word.
I really don’t know what I’m doing when it comes to dating. Do people even go on dates?
I think I’ve been on dates before. Definitely one, I couldn’t find the restaurant I was meant to take my lady friend to and ended up asleep on the train home. Yup, good work Al. I think that answers why you and dating are not well acquainted.
But, dating is pretty dated these days surely? Everyone just meets people through other social occasions or drunkenly on nights out or through friends of friends. Or through online dating websites…
Very reluctantly I decided to give this online dating a go.
I began with the obvious choices. Eharmony.co.uk and match.com. They are the ones you always see on the adverts with the annoyingly happy actors. Surely, these things can never work. But, then I did pick up a brother’s wedding invite the other day, two people who met over the internet…
Yeah, I hated these websites. You had to fill out endless forms about personality stuff. Then, they would time-out, refresh and everything has to be entered once again. Grrrr. Then, they want to charge you £30 a month for the privilege??? Blimey.
Then, there were these rumours of something called Plenty of Fish (POF). Sounded good because it was free. So, I quickly rustled up a profile for myself. Now, I think this is where it all started to go wrong…
I uploaded photos, watched the ‘how to do good on POF’ videos and thought a little about what my likes and dislikes are.
Then, we waited…
If the Guinness advert is right about good things coming to those who wait, then it must be the frustration, emptiness and loneliness that give the stout such a murky colour.
No responses, as to be expected. So we began chatting to people or at least trying to. First of all, I allowed my friends Dom, Umar and Cat choose a person for me and message them. Absolutely nothing back. How rude.
So, then, I opted for looking for people who had something vaguely interesting in their profile. I got chatting to a nice person because they were from NZ and I’m apparently obsessed with such a country. Had a lovely chat but that was about it. Am I supposed to feed the person cheesy lines or say other things I don’t mean or care about to blossom this textual relationship?
So, I thought I’d work on the profile a bit. Change things around a bit. Make things simple. After the rebranding, the business still failed to blossom. Gutting.
And that is about as far as this not very exciting, inspiring or successful thing has taken me. Sorry guys. I’ll try harder in the future…
Maybe, I shouldn’t advertise Nigel Thornberry as being my hero in the headline…….
